Zwischen Jakarta und Hamburg liegen nicht etwa zwei Kontinente und sechs Meere, sondern ungezählte Papierberge. Eine Reportage aus der bizarren Welt der deutschen Bürokratie.
Between Jakarta and Hamburg lie not two continents or six oceans, but innumerable mountains of paperwork. A story on the bizarre world of German bureaucracy.
“Mr. Sukarno … ” [name changed]/“You’ve been in Germany 14 years … ”/“ … and now you want to leave?”/Hamburg was on my mind ever since I first played this one strategy game./I was nine or ten back then. After finishing school, I just wanted to get out of Indonesia./To study abroad. And to work! I landed in Hamburg on May 26, 2001.
Before I left, I spent a year cramming in as much German as I could. I thought I was well-prepared./But I wasn’t./Especially not for the German bureaucracy./Status Error: Your residence permit for applying to schools is expiring./I finally completed my studies in 2009. I lingered around, a huge gap in between, then came love and well … but then I was ready to dive into the working world./”I’m ready!”/If not for … /Status Error: Your residence permit to look for work after completion of studies expires after 12 months (today it’s 18 months)./Employment in a café or as a translator wouldn’t have been sufficient for the office. Because I studied computer sciences, it’d have to be a job in my field./Mail Inbox: Refusals and deadline reminders./“I found something in Düsseldorf.”/Two months before I would have had to leave, a friend of mine recommended a company in Düsseldorf./The job interview went really well. On my way home, my new boss even gave me a call./Which didn’t necessarily mean I could start working. He’d have to first take care of the employment office formalities./He wrote the employment office that he needed Indonesian employees./“We’re expanding to Indonesia.”/Such a lie!
After three weeks, my phone finally rang./“The employment office refused.”/“We’re not allowed to hire you for 2,600 Euro a month.”/”Crap! Dammit! No! What now?!”/Because I’m not an EU citizen, my boss could only hire me if there wasn’t an equally qualified applicant from Germany or Europe. [No longer applies for alumni of German universities.]/“But you’re in luck. You’re getting 3,000 Euro.”/Pretty crazy: the rule aimed at protecting the German market from wage dumping allowed me, as a foreigner, to get a higher salary./I was able to start in July./I had to show my bank statements a couple times to prove that I’m consistently earning that much./I really hated my first few days in Düsseldorf, having to start over without any friends./But then I started to get in the groove of things./For five years now, I had been paying into the German pension fund./Status request: update on permanent residence permit (allowing people to live and work in Germany without restriction)./An issue has arisen. It is assumed that you have worked longer than allowed during your studies. Provide all documentation from the past years to your case officer immediately./Wow, great!/I simply threw all my financial statements in my case worker’s mailbox./I’m sure he never read them. Pure harassment!/But I received my permanent residence permit. I went back to Hamburg in October of 2013. For my girlfriend, who was studying there, and for a job that paid more. There I earned 3,750 Euro.
But the work was pretty boring./I began developing my own app with my girlfriend and her university friends in my spare time./You’ve just won: 10,000 Euro start-up capital. Buttons: Ignore|Accept/In June 2015, we won a competition for start-ups. That was the chance to be self-employed./It’s not that easy in Germany … and compared to Indonesia very expensive!/Pop-up: declare sales tax, search for investors, register the business, tax law, entry into the commercial registry, choose legal status./Status request: found a start-up in Germany|USA|Indonesia/Back to Indonesia? Of all times now? Just as I’m allowed to stay?/To be honest, I’d thought about it for some time. My girlfriend is from Indonesia, too. Besides, I hated not being able to see my parents as often./Status request: Seriously found a start-up in Indonesia? Button: Okay, and lose my permanent residence permit./“And that’s when I thought …”/“Fuck it all!”/“It’s easier in Indonesia anyway.”/“I’m sure the weather in Indonesia is warm and fantastic.”/“Not as cold as here.”/“Well, good luck!”
